You may be wondering if any of our services might be helpful to you or someone you love. We invite you to consider the following reflections by Bay Area women and men who have been touched by our program. They speak of the Hurt that led them to reach out for help, the Hope they found in our programs, and the Healing they experienced through After the Choice:

The Hurt
"Not a day goes by that I don’t think of my unborn baby." - Alexis

"I know God’s forgiven me, but I can’t forgive myself." - Shawna

"You’re supposed to learn the first time, but I did it 3 times. No one close to me knows about those last two…" - Marta

"For me, the abortion was like a bomb exploding where my body and mind and spirit all come together." – Liz

"We’d waited 29 years to grieve the loss of those two babies, and it was eating away at our marriage." - Barry

"Going to my nieces’ baptisms and birthdays, and seeing my friends having babies is hard for me." - Silvia

"When my wife was miscarrying our first child at 22 weeks, the hospital staff asked if she’d ever had an abortion. She did, and we were both angry that she was never told it could affect her ability to have kids in the future." - Duane

"I always thought anxiety was just a part of being an adult. Now I realize my numbness and depression had to do with the abortions I had at age 18 and 19." - Sue

"When I read the program materials, I just broke down crying, so obviously it hit something in me. – Jose

"Abortion just doesn’t go away… here I am 21 years later, and it still hasn’t gone away." - Carmen

The Hope
"I couldn’t believe when I saw the ad. You hear it’s sponsored by the Catholic church, and you figure you’ll be judged, but instead I found compassion." – Monique

"I never knew there was help like this out there." - Gail

"The support group was just what I needed. I was terrified to go, but the facilitators were good at helping me talk about it. The prayer and music and drawing all helped me deal with feelings I’d run from for years." - Zoe

"My therapist saw I was stuck in dealing with my abortion. She could tell my issues were spiritual, so she suggested the retreat. Thank God – it was a real breakthrough for me." – Tina

"Everything I saw for dealing with abortion was directed at women. Then I found out about the retreat. I wondered how I’d feel as a guy there. But I went and felt welcome. It helped me see my role in my girlfriend’s abortion, and accept forgiveness for the huge part I played in it." - Marc

"It felt safe to explore the depths of pain I’d buried deep inside for many years." - Mike

The Healing

"I feel more at peace with myself and in my relationship with my boyfriend. Thanks for suggesting that I share the memorial service with him." - Kate

"I’ve definitely found a renewed sense of my faith… something I’ve been searching for." - Theresa

"Realizing I’d been a mother was a sort of epiphany for me. I’d been terrified to have other kids, and that fear’s not there any more." - Anna

"Whenever I thought of my abortions, I’d just cry. With my supporter, and then on the retreat, I still cried a lot, but the tears changed. Now they’re not overwhelming, and they carry feelings of joy and hope, knowing my babies are in heaven waiting for me." - Gladys

"I knew about the love and mercy of God but now I’ve truly felt God’s love and mercy." - Julie

"I signed up for the group from a very mental place. Only once I began the process did I realize how much feeling lay buried deep inside. I’d have never believed it possible to heal so much. All I had to do was show up and be open." - Ann

"We’re so grateful there was a place for us to come as a couple." - Sean

Some words from Pope John Paul II:

"I would now like to say a special word to women who have had an abortion. The Church is aware of the many factors which may have influenced your decision, and she does not doubt that in many cases it was a painful and even shattering decision. The wound in your heart may not yet have healed. Certainly what happened was and remains terribly wrong.

But do not give in to discouragement and do not lose hope. Try rather to understand what happened and face it honestly. If you have not already done so, give yourselves over with humility and trust to repentance. The Father of mercies is ready to give you his forgiveness and his peace in the Sacrament of Reconciliation. You will come to understand that nothing is definitively lost and you will also be able to ask forgiveness from your child, who is now living in the Lord.

With the friendly and expert help and advice of other people, and as a result of your own painful experience, you can be among the most eloquent defenders of everyone's right to life. Through your commitment to life, whether by accepting the birth of other children or by welcoming and caring for those most in need of someone to be close to them, you will become promoters of a new way of looking at human life."

Pope John Paul II
Evangelium vitae ("The Gospel of Life") #99

"It is true that the decision to have an abortion is often tragic and painful for the mother, insofar as the decision to rid herself of the fruit of conception is not made for purely selfish reasons or out of convenience, but out of a desire to protect certain important values such as her own health or a decent standard of living for other members of the family. Sometimes it is feared that the child to be born would live in such conditions that it would be better if the birth did not take place.

Nevertheless, these reasons and others like them, however serious and tragic, can never justify the deliberate killing of an innocent human being. As well as the mother, there are often other people too who decide upon the death of the child in the womb. In the first place, the father of the child may be to blame, not only when he directly pressures the woman to have an abortion, but also when he indirectly encourages such a decision on her part by leaving her alone to face the problems of pregnancy... Nor can one overlook the pressures which sometimes come from the wider family circle and from friends.

Sometimes the woman is subjected to such strong pressure that she feels psychologically forced to have an abortion. Certainly in this case moral responsibility lies particularly with those who have directly or indirectly obliged her to have an abortion.

Doctors and nurses are also responsible, when they place at the service of death skills which were acquired for promoting life."

Pope John Paul II
Evangelium vitae ("The Gospel of Life") #58-59